Wednesday, June 07, 2023

still

 



Is it a shocking discovery to learn that you still have feelings for him after all these years?

No.
Not really. 
Rather like, I surrender.

Surrender to my own feelings.
Own it up.
I know things will stay the same,
but at least,
admitting and owning it up make my chest feels a little lighter.

It gets annoying though.
Because once I concede defeat to my feelings,
I’ll keep on looking and searching for him everywhere.
My mind will unconsciously wander back to him
and wonder;
“If he was here, it would be like this.”
“It would be probably different if he was here.”
“How should I react or what should I do if it was him?”

Whatever happened back in the past between us,
If it was possible, I’d love to erase and redo it all over.

That way, I’d do a wise choice and never get to know you.